The VMA's were a clusterfuck

Obviously, my first comment is going to be about Ms. Spears. Firstly, we all know the performance was horrendous. She looked like she'd been shot with a tranquilizer dart. Additionally, she had no business wearing that outfit. Some of you will say, "But Shame-free, she's had two children." or "But Shame-free, she wasn't fat. Do you want everyone to look anorexic?"

Let's get a few things straight. If you are making your comeback, which one would assume this was, and you feel it necessary to wear a black bikini in front of millions of people you better make damn sure you look amazing - not sort-of alright. She could have just as easily wore some sort of slinky top and avoided it all together. Clearly her life is full of people who couldn't care less about her personally or professionally. Her bad weave alone was proof of this. I actually feel bad for her.

Onward, Tommy Lee and Kid Rock got into a fight. Considering they have both slept with the STD Queen of Los Angeles I think we both know who it pertained to. Could the two of them possibly look anymore tired? Just to clear it up, I'm talking about Tommy and Kid, not Pam's boobs.

Kanye West further reinterated why I can't stant him. Acting out in quite the unsavory fashion yet again he pouted because he didn't win. If I ever had the chance I'd sucker punch him right in the mouth. But only if he couldn't hit me back.

Sad to say that none of the rock performances were outstanding. Fall Out Boy and Foo Fighters were what you would have expected. The stand-out performance of the night was Chris Brown. As you all know, I wouldn't typically write about him but he was impressive on all counts.

All the clips can be seen at http://www.mtv.com/ including some silliness about Ashlee Simpson giving Pete Wentz a lapdance. Check out the 60 second summary here. It was more interesting than the actual show.